Thursday 22 March 2012

luahan di pagi hari

kejap lagi nak masuk office. today 1st day boss masuk after cuti 2 minggu. kerja confirmlah bertimbun kan. huwargh! weekend ni ade event. lagi lah tak suke. but nak buat cmne, kerja. oh.. anyway, bukan nak luah pasal kerja tapi pasal life.

urm. semlm kinda had a heart to heart talk dengan hashrul. well, ade certain things yang tak dapat nak terima. macam susah, bukan tak dapat nak terima. nak tak nak kena telan lah. pasal maybe i made some mistakes too, maybe different type but effect sakit hati same kut. dia ade buat perumpamaan, 'orang kencing manis, kena paksa makan gula, alang2 dah start makan, baik makan habis2'. itu referring to 1 situation we had. i wonder if i did the same thing, dia boleh terima tak kite yang cakap macam tu? persoalan lain pulak timbul after that, 'pernah ke terpakse jumpe? pernah ke terpakse keluar?'. 

jue dah pesan:
this period kena patient sangat2

alang2 kan, i nak mintak maaf dengan someone yang sentiase ade tuk i - janji dia, akan ade time baik/buruk/jahat and walau pun tergolek2 sampai bile2. even though hati dia sakit dengan ape i dah buat, dia tetap ade. anytime. sentiase on stand by kut. thank you for being there through my ups and downs (mostly my downs?) as long as i can ever remember. thank you for looking over me all this while and jadi macam my own guardian angel. sorry for all the heartaches i caused and the tears you have shed for me. i know now that you are the only person that will never break my heart. i know things end up differently but i think its a better future kan for the both of us. ini sedikit open but maybe orang macam you deserve a public apology from me. i ade sedikit menyesal on how i handled things back then tapi i can't change what i did but, you should know that i am certainly a different person now - stronger, lebih independent and basically tak macam when i was with you (dah tak berape macam dak kecik dah, keadaan paksa untuk grow up and bangkit sendiri kut, i have no other choice).. erm.. halalkan makan minum and pray for our better future eh. i am sorry and thank you.. :)

1 comment:

zuezul said...

dear niesa,

huhuhu...sabar byk2 k..
biasalah,dugaan bila nak bina "ikatan yang suci"...like what i said before, kene betul2 kental. But as kita nie only manusia biasa,so tempias emosi tu memang meruap2 kan..but just let it go. kata abu,yang dah lepas biar lepas..start new day with new dreams and hope.

one more thing,
nak deal ngan the one yang kite akan share kita punya life memang susah,byk benda yang kita akan fight sebab setiap hari akan ada je benda baru yang kita belaja tentang dia,same goes to him. try to accept dia seadanya vice versa.

and,
jangan tinggal doa,selalu! doakan yang nisa kuat ok utk semua nie! ingat, every decision yang kita buat,akan ada kesan nye..baik or buruk, kita kene lalui ok! :-) senyum.....